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Nap Time!!!

Sunday, March 16, 2008
My own feelings

As for my own personal feelings about the elections, I don't think I've ever cared less about an ASUC election, except maybe my freshman year as an undergrad (way back in 2001). Interesting note: My RA at the time was Tony Falcone, which may amuse any old-school ASUC dudes who still check the blog.

To a person who feels safest when the people in charge are in conflict (e.g. me), one of the biggest drawbacks of a Student Action executive slate is their blind agreement with the university administration on almost everything. This attitude helped bring us the ridiculous Lower Sproul "give money to the university for no reason whatsoever" fee and the RSF "we suck too much to convince people to show up, so it's subsidy time!" fee, although Josh Daniels's own willingness to bend over for the administration helped push that first one.

Similarly, Student Action domination of all aspects of the ASUC led to some of the most dramatic corruption we've ever seen in the "the legal bills I incurred failing to sue the ASUC must be paid by the student body" conflict of 2006. I'm still astounded that anyone succeeded in derailing it, though I'm not fully convinced that's what happened.

CalSERVE, on the other hand, claims my voice as its own, which is personally offensive to me. It postulates the existence of some "student voice," and denies any dissent. It denies the individuality and humanity of most students, preferring to define people in terms of their collective identities, grouping them into "communities." Their ridiculously one-sided and often false statements on world events make me gag when they insist that I'm the one making them.

Where does that leave me? With SQUELCH!, of course, but let's be real. As a commentator, CalSERVE is the way to go, because conflict gives me something to talk about. It's also safer for my wallet. My own personal dignity, though, demands Student Action control. CalSERVE is my enemy. They've declared themselves to be such year after year. Student Action perceives me to be their enemy, for some reason (they didn't even send me their press release... *sniffle*), but they're pretty much the enemy of my enemy.

Now that I'm quitting being a commentator, I have less reason to want a CalSERVE victory. There's still the money thing, of course, but the fact that I have the spare cash to sink into large-scale election jokes suggests that my opposition to fee increases is more a matter of principle than one of pocket protection, and in a war of principles, the party which dehumanizes me loses.

Since CalSERVE has outlived its usefulness as a provider of my entertainment, I think I'm going to throw my unenthusiastic vote in with Student Action this year. Don't expect me to be a partisan, though, as I'll gleefully mock every stupid campaign detail I notice from SA.

posted by Beetle Aurora Drake 3/16/2008 10:11:00 PM #
Comments (4)
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SA: Dislike the people
CS: Dislike the tactics
SA & CS: Dislike the policies

What am I left with?
SQUELCH! But yeah. If enough people vote for non-SA/CS folks without including SA/CS anywhere on their ballots, the universe explodes, so you can do that. I guess you could call it "making a statement," though it's a pretty puny one.

Then again, putting people in the ASUC is not what friends do. If you dislike the SA people, vote them into office! You'll bring unimaginable suffering upon them.
But since it's clear that SA majorities inevitably lead to unfathomable cronyism and corruption (even before Oren "Give My Daddy His Money Back!" Gabriel and Ilana "Man Voice" Nankin), as well as the whole personal ass-slaves of Bobby B thing, why cast votes for them at all?

And you're right in everything you say about CalServe too. The only reason I voted for them last year was to keep Man Voice and Eunice "Down Syndrome" Moon out of office. The CS people still like sucking themselves off on any poorly-informed issue because it makes their souls feel morally richer, while all the SA people like sucking each other off just because it tastes so damn good to them.

But me? That taste has long gone sour. Straight SQUELCH! ticket this year, and you can take that to the bank. Jews are the only people we should trust with our money anyway, right?
The reality is that you don't really have the choice "SQUELCH!" in the executive races. You can vote for them, of course (I plan to), but not following up with a vote for a major party is pretty much the same as "No preference."
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