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Nap Time!!!

Friday, July 22, 2005
Knowing the facts!

Recap: Continuing on with the AlcoholEdu course (survey, pre-test 1-10, pre-test 11-20, verdict) After learning about advertising and stereotypical image-choosing in chapter 1, and being judged, and then being reminded that AlcoholEdu has the minority, and thus wrong, opinion, it's time to start with Chapter 2: Knowing the Facts.

Unlike Chapter 1, they give me the opportunity to test out by showing my vast body of knowledge on alcohol. Here we go with another test!

1. "Proof" is...

What you're going to have, of how much I don't need this course, after I'm done with this test. Anyway, we've got some trick answers: Either "The percentage of alcohol in a drink (twice the alcohol content)" or "The content of alcohol in a drink (twice the percent)." I won't fall for the trick, so I'll go with the obvious alternative answer, "ID showing that you’re 21." That is proof, after all.

2. Light beer...

Great taste. No, less filling. Great taste! Less filling! (I don't actually remember how that commercial goes.) Well, light means less, so I'll go with "Has less alcohol, carbs, and calories than regular beer," rather than one of the more conservative answers. (The real answer is "weighs less," but that's not an option, either. Who writes these things?)

3. A standard drink is:

I've already answered this one in the pre-test. But this time they have way more numbers. I'm going to get a headache. Uh... uh... I'll go with "12 oz. malt liquor (6% alcohol), 12 oz. wine (12% alcohol), 1.5 oz. liquor (30% alcohol)." It only makes sense, after all, for something with twice the alcohol content but the same size to be considered the same number of drinks.

1. Women reach higher BACs than men, all things being equal, because...

Hey, who reset the numbering? If my personal, 1 minute-2 gallon experience is any indication, the answer is "Women drink faster than men."

2. Which of the following factors will not influence your BAC:

Oooh, one of those "not" questions. Let's see. "Sex" reduces BAC, because you secrete it in bodily fluids. "Weight" doesn't because alcohol is liquid, and thus 'stretchy' and can affect an arbitrary amount of weight. "Family history" does, because if your pa' drinks enough, his sperm will carry a keg or two to the egg which gets incorporated into your DNA, so it's like you always have a keg in your genes. "How much food you’ve eaten before drinking" certainly does, at least if you eat alcoholic food. So I guess it's "Weight."

3. "BAC" stands for:

Now that I've answered a question about BAC, let's see if I even know what it means. The closest answer they have is "Blood Absolute Content," although truthfully it's "Blood Absolut Content," named after the vodka. If you don't drink Absolut, your BAC is 0 (but you're also lame, if I remember the ads correctly).

1. If alcohol has an effect on the frontal lobes, you might see a difference in which of the following list of functions?

Yeah, don't put alcohol on your ear-lobes. I mean, the frontal ear lobes. If you have ears on the back of your head, you can put alcohol there, it'll be fine. Still, I have no idea what any of these lists mean, so I'll just pick one at random... uh... "Impulse control, decision-making, speaking clearly, and memory formation."

2. Alcohol's major effects on judgment and decision-making occur in the:

Bar? Once again the correct answer is unavailable. Uh... man, these are all complicated brain parts... I'll have to go random again and guess... "posterior cerebral cortex." It's the longest, so it must be right in a sciency question.

1. Students who go to class with a hangover tend to learn less than students who do not have a hangover.

False! They learn more!

2. Dehydration during a hangover occurs when alcohol alters activity in the:

Oh, man, more brain parts. "Cerebral cortex" is alliterative, so that's my guess.

It then gives some options for opting out of certain parts, but I wouldn't want to miss any important facts, so I won't opt out. I will note, though, that one of the unimportant things we can opt out of is a description of "Positive Health Effects."

You have not tested out of any of the Test Out sections in Chapter 2

OMG! Learn to grade your tests, you bastards! The actual learning will begin next post.

posted by Beetle Aurora Drake 7/22/2005 10:38:00 PM #
Comments (9)
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Comments:
wow.. i tried googling one of the answers to the AlcoholEdu thing and you blog came up..

how... weird..
 
man, i'm required to take this crap for school. googled. this is the only thing that came up. wish someone would post the real answers, not gonna be me though.
 
why would you put up the fake answers.
 
You are fucking awesome. Ha. The fact that people have actually left jerk off messages to you is pretty lame. This was just what I needed to read to feel better about taking this crap test. Now I will go back to googling the real answers. Thanks again for the laugh.
 
I just finished the course with 5 minutes to spare before the due date, it was horrible at the end. It says the final exam would take 15-30 minutes and I went throught it in like 6 (got a 95). I dont think it would have been that bad if i hadn't made it, but still, ugh, that was crappy (I did the whole thing today)
 
Which of the following factors will not influence your BAC?

I missed the "not" and got it wrong. Perhaps I should've checked out this page before I answered that question...funny stuff, btw.
 
RIGHT ANSWERS... standard drink is second from the bottom
Women reach higher BACs than men, all things being equal, because enzimes.
If alcohol has an effect on the frontal lobes, you might see a difference in which of the following list of functions Slirred speach
Hippocampus-memory
frontal lobes -long term storage
 
Dude, I thought this shit was real. You almost screwed me big time. Luckily all these other people fell for it before I did. So thanks! hahaha
 
all i have to say is that i have been thoroughly entertained tonight LOL
 
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