Wednesday, June 22, 2005
The Beetle Beatties
It's that time of year again. It's time for the Beetle Beatties! Nominate your favorite local figure for a Beetle Beattie today! Here are the rules:
It needs to be local. Preferably a local commenting on something in Berkeley.
It should be supported with an article or something.
Unless it's really, really good, it should be from the past 3-4 years.
The categories, with my initial nominations (I haven't really looked, yet, these are just the first examples I found to get the ball rolling), are:
Worst Daily Cal article
(As my sidebar suggests, I'd nominate Silence, Wishes, and the Torment of War)
Worst Daily Cal picture
(Schematic missing boyfriend)
Worst Daily Cal editorial cartoon
(Pick your Rifkind cartoon.)
Dumbest "Person-on-Street" comment
(Probably from the Daily Cal, but it doesn't have to be. This is the category for the stupid comments people make to the newspaper without thinking. While I don't think they ever put it online, after the 2004 election, they asked people why they voted the way they did, and Angela Natividad said "I voted for Bush because Kerry is too idealistic for my country.")
Worst misspeech
(When you're not sure what you're saying, sometimes the words come out and say something else, like this from Matt Arkin: "We worked to draw in a lot of people who wouldn't have considered joining a fraternity and sorority by tailoring the message to appeal to more people based on what we thought were the weaknesses.")
Dumbest verbal blow job
(When people love others too much, they say things like Chelsea Collonge did: "I can't even imagine walking for an hour, much less five days.")
Most nonsensical protest
(I don't really feel like looking so let's take the protest Collonge was talking about: If we walk far enough, our student fees will go down. Anyway, this category is for those protests which don't quite seem to match their cause.)
Biggest overstatement
(The immediate comment that sprung to mind was one from Berkeley High African-American studies teacher Robert McKnight, on budget cuts rearranging the African-American studies department: "I think it's the manifestation of white supremacy at its zenith.")
Anyway, suggest nominations. I haven't put any effort into these, so they aren't necessarily the best, and don't necessarily deserve Beetle Beatties. You can even suggest other categories, though they're supposed to be the kinds of things we see all the time around here.
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