ASUC Pre-AwardsAs vaguely hinted at, here are some awards based on the campaign material of our incoming ASUC officers. (As mentioned before, I couldn't get ahold of independent party candidate material)BandwagonThe following officers promise, usually generically, to "bring the campus community together" or "build a strong community" or "promote campus dialogue" or some such: Chris Abad, Josie Alvarez, Manny Buenrostro, Anil Daryani, Rita Encarnacion, Oren Gabriel, Vishal Gupta, Ki-Hong Lee, Anthony Lin, Ashley Thomas, and Igor Tregub.Anti-GoalManny Buenrostro wants to support pride in our campus diversity by bringing groups together to "provide a single voice for the university."Oops, I said that backwardsAhmad Huzair wants to protect us from infringements on our academic freedom, such as "students and faculty being placed under scrutiny for voicing unconventional opinions." And he wants to do this through the "Hate and Bias Task Force," to "ensure their protection." That is, he is concerned about freedom of expression, and wants to subject those who scrutinize other people's opinions to scrutiny.But who watches the watchers?Anil Daryani promises to meet with senators periodically to make sure they're keeping their campaign promises. Something tells me nobody'll be checking to make sure that promise is kept.We are the Borg. Resistance is futile.Anthony Lin wants all Asian students to put aside their differences and create an "Asian Pacific American/Asian Caucus." As he says, "Only as a collective can we work towards positive change."Bonus: Our only problem is that we have no solutionAlso for Anthony Lin, I'll just quote it right from the campaign site:"Asian Pacific American students make up more than 40% of Cal's population, but we lack a cohesive space to come together. As a Community, we must look past our politics and understand that these issues are what connect us. My goal as a senator is to establish an Asian Pacific American/ Asian Caucus. This safe space will serve the purpose of allowing much needed dialogue about the issues facing our communities."Apparently, the only issue facing APA students is that they don't have a space to come together. And they must have a space so that they can face that issue. Of course, once they get that space, there won't be an issue anymore.Good Luck With ThatDavid Kim wants to stop human rights violations in North Korea and Iran. From the ASUC senate.Scapegoat-in-AdvanceSharon Han promises to make a university education affordable. Good thing it's not under her control, so she can blame someone else when she fails.WTF?Vishal Gupta says:"Build South Asian CommunityThe South Asian student groups offer many opportunities for students in the UC Berkeley community. I intend on breaking cultural and ethnic barriers, because these groups are inclusive of the greater Berkeley population. I want to represent the South Asian community in the ASUC by bringing the South Asian student groups together. I would like to create a greater sense of community that can educate the greater campus community."CommunismVishal Gupta also wants to bring opportunities to the unpopular student groups, because "All students at Cal are involved in some way, and all deserve recognition."Mad LibsJesse Yang's primary quality, according to the voter's guide, is that he is independent. He doesn't have any plans ahead of time, but hey, let him know what you want.Useless HippieLisa Putkey. Read her blurb in the voter's guide.Cramped WingsOren Gabriel is a third-generation Cal student. Dude. Seriously. Spread those wings a bit. posted by Beetle Aurora Drake 6/17/2005 03:05:00 PM # Comments (0) . . .
